.you belong here (on leadership)
A lot has happened since my last post last month. I wasn’t really able to keep up with my weekly #hankkaLessons posts, but I’ve learned not to beat myself up about it, just restart whenever I can.
So here I am.
I’ve been in Japan attending the 500 Global programme, helping us and 13 other international startups expand to the Japanese market, which culminated in Demo Day on the 16th of February.
As I looked around, it became even more apparent to me how lucky I am to work in technology and how many good people I’ve met on my way, who helped me to get where I am today. Who gave me the chance to prove myself.
But none of this wouldn’t happen if I didn’t believe that I belong here.
I always thought of tech as one of the most meritocratic professions, so I never really had a problem with being a woman in tech, a minority. On the contrary, it often worked to my advantage.
If what you were building was providing value to others, the market would reward you.
Yes, I knew the numbers (such as the fact that women-founded startups raised 1.9% of all VC funds in 2022.). I knew of and saw the broculture all around me, and I knew that most of the successful startups were founded by men. But focusing and cursing reality for what it is, but doing nothing about it would be a waste of my energy. And it would do nothing good to those who feel underrepresented.
Instead of pointing at differences, a common denominator is always the best starting point for a revolution.
I knew that role models are important, especially for those young ones, and those who are just entering the market and need more guidance. I wasn’t standing still and so 7 years ago I co-founded local Warsaw and London chapters of NGO Girls in Tech. I knew there is more of us. Some just needed a little more encouragement to stand up in a spotlight. We need to support each other to be seen. By doing so, we also make it commonplace for women to be heard, so we don’t have to fight so hard individually.
It was never about them (guys) vs. us, anyway — at least in our chapters. It was about providing a platform for those kick-ass humans, both men and women, who go an extra mile to provide value to the others.
I’m a big girl now, and have learned that if you don’t take yourself seriously, nobody else will. So my advice to anyone would be — know yourself as equal. Gender shouldn’t bias your interactions or the choices you make at work. Behave and live as an equal to be treated as one. Don’t chase the correction. Instead, get a seat at the table and speak up.
What would you do if you weren’t afraid?”
Spencer Johnson, M.D
Speak up on behalf of your ideas because if you don’t, someone else will say it, and you wish you had said it first. I realised I must put myself in the spotlight, even if I am a minority there, and even if it feels uncomfortable at first. Do your thing despite of it.
You should not question whether you belong. Just do it. And once you get your chance and make a mark, pave the way for those few steps behind you.
Re-evaluate your beliefs
Being affected by gender bias (or any other kind of bias) could alter you belief systems in a way that does not serve you. So make it a conscious exercise to regularly re-evaluate your own beliefs and question whether they are a) true and b) serving you.
That said, if the environment is the problem and you can’t change it, seek a culture that aligns with your values. Know your own worth and don’t make yourself small. It is easy to go into the protective mode of making yourself small or retreating into a comfort zone. Know the signs and take action to lean out. Discomfort means you’re growing.
I love these guys. All of them are amazing founders and leaders in the making.
Don’t wait for mentors to come to you
In the early days, when I was looking for guidance from those ahead of me, I was questioning what value I can offer to those way more successful and wealthier than me, but I found out that’s a wrong perspective.
Finding a mentor may seem like an intimidating task, but you’ll be surprised at how willing most people are to share their time if you just ask.
They can learn from you as much as you can from them. You provide a fresh perspective, unbiased by the old habits and comfort. Just don’t try to please others. Be real. They can tell if you’re just trying to bs your way in.
I must admit — most of my biggest allies and closest mentors are all men. Not sure why this is the case, and why many women turn hostile to other women when they get to leadership positions. I have some ideas but that’s a topic for a separate post.
Give
While it’s important to seek support from others, I never forget to do the same for others. Those who give, thrive. If you lift people up, they will do the same.
I offer my time, resources and support to people both inside my closest circle and out. Even this blog is (so I hope) a small form of guidance to others, showing them my entrepreneurial journey and helping avoid mistakes I’ve made.
That said, value your time and don’t say yes to everything, but choose wisely any initiatives you commit yourself to. Always give your best, or don’t do that thing at all.
500 Global Demo Day, Nagoya Feb ‘23.
Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t — you’re right.
Henry Ford
Don’t let others define you
People will try to define you if you let them. I have been pigeonholed in the past, but I decided that I am much more than this, so I made it happen.
This type of determination requires strong feelings of self-worth and confidence from within. Developing this sense of self-esteem may be more important than support from others, but it won’t grow overnight. If you need to, fake it until you become it.
When you see an opportunity to bolster yourself, take it. Be bold, take control, and get your own seat at the table.
>>This post originally appeared on my hankka.com blog<<
